Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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