He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize