Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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