So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
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if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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