We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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