I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
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