i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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