a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
