I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize