Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
