I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
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