Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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