jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
