i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
