come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
