Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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