So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
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Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
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No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
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