sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
