I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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