OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
