so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Randomize
