I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
