The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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