i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
