I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
He? As in you personified your dick?
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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