She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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