her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Randomize
