His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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