somebody snuck up and got me drunk
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
please come you make the beer taste better
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize