I will die if light touches me.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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