Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
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