people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Randomize
