YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Randomize
