i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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