I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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