i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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