My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize