I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Enjoy the penises
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
