She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
