Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
