One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Randomize
