everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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