Umm I'm too high to move.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
