Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
