I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize