Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
