I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
