I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
there was a trapeze. enough said
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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