YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
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