you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Oh god it's open bar.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize