I can feel you judging me through the phone.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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