summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize